Dragon Age: Descent

An Opening
Definitely not plagiarised.

Two mooses, both alike in dignity,
In fair Shrewsbury, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new rabidity
Where rabid blood makes rabid hands unclean.
From forth the rabid loins of these two foes
A pair of shrew-cross’d mooses take their life;
Whose rabid NORMAL piteous overthrows
Do with their moose bury their muthies’ strife.
The rabid passage of their mooose-mark’d love,
And the philanthropy of their muthies’ rage,
Which, but their mooses’ end, nought could remove,
Is now the two hours’ moosing of our stage;
The which if you with rabid ears attend,
What here shall miss our Welsh National Party shall strive to mend.

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Descent into Darkness
The first instalment of our party's adventures...

The Fifth Blight is over. It caused death and destruction, which has left many in utter desolation. The Blight was ended before it had time to fully gain momentum, thanks to courageous acts carried out by the aptly titled Hero of Ferelden. Our ridiculously good-looking hero was of noble blood and nature; she now shares the throne with her beloved Alistair.

During the Blight, many took refuge in the City of Chains, Kirkwall. Now that the Blight is over, many are returning to their homeland. Unfortunately, the landscape has dramatically changed in many places, due to overwhelming numbers of Darkspawn, so those who return do not always find what they hoped for.

The ship, Andraste’s Gloves, provides the most comfortable transport between Kirkwall and Ferelden’s most bustling port, Amaranthine. For 10 sovereigns per ticket, you would expect only the best. This is the very boat where our party are destined to meet…

However, Kirkwall is a small place with only one pub, which means that they all find themselves in closer quarters than they might ever know, the night before their ship embarks and their destinies collide.

The Hanged Man is known for its cheap beer and perpetually merry customers. One (temporarily) sober and androgynous customer found itself in a generous mood. It charitably offered to buy the entire pub a round of drinks. 34 patrons gratefully pounced on the offer, and in the mass scramble, Alissa perceptibly took the opportunity to steal the baggily-clad figure’s remaining gold… scoring herself a tidy sum of 50 sovereigns. Needless to say that she was not so outlandishly generous with it.

This did leave our androgynous character without any gold to cover the cost of the next round that it ludicrously offered to its 34 new ‘friends’. Unfortunately, its ‘friends’ did not take kindly to its inability to see through its offer, and chased it out of the pub. Thus resulted in it sleeping by the harbour; its new ‘friend’ a barrel that it had drunkenly taken to (what a light-weight). When it had finally fallen asleep, a wandering drunkard became curious of its true gender, disrobing it and breaking the straps to its scalemail. His curiosity sated, he just couldn’t resist drawing several doodles (including a penis) on its unresponsive face with mud.

After the uproar in The Hanged Man had died down, a robed lady called Ezri Delmastro descended from her room to the bar, in order to ask Maria (a serving wench) what all the noise was about. After a brief explanation, she decided to sit and enjoy the bar least watered-down ale for one last night in the place she had temporarily called home.

The next morning, Ezri said her goodbye to the staff that she had come to know very well. She shared a teary goodbye with Maria, who gave her a purple silken scarf that had been passed to her from her Grandma.

Soon, our party all found themselves outside the boat that they had already bought their tickets for. Before the gangplank was lowered, our androgynous fellow decided to try to speak to a wealthy-looking gentleman. Unfortunately for it, the gent assumed it was a beggar and brushed it off rather brashly. Thankfully a chap called Valeros, who witnessed its blunder the previous night in the pub, was there to calm it down before it did something else stupid. Seriously, let’s all be really glad about that. Thanks, Valeros.

As soon as the sun rose over the horizon, the gangplank lowered, and Simon the Sailor approached the 10 eager passengers. He took their tickets, invited them on-board and gave them a tour of the ship – pointing out the areas which they were not to go in, no matter what. He then informed them that they would meet Captain Merek over breakfast, which would be as soon as the boat set sail.

He then left them to get comfortable in their rooms.

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